Thursday, March 31, 2011

A sad ending to a beautiful beginning

So, the sad truth is, I'm having a miscarriage. I went into the doctor today because I was still spotting, and they thought it was 90% chance that it was a blighted ovum. I got my blood drawn to check my pregnancy hormones, and honestly keep a positive attitude. I was hanging on to the 10% chance that there was at least 1 baby and everything was fine. Later this evening I started bleeding more heavily, clotting, and cramping. It's pretty obvious that it's a miscarriage. I've had 2 before in my first and second pregnancies, so I know what it feels and looks like. So I will call my doctor in the morning, since the on call doctor was no help at all [once again], and he will most likely have me in tomorrow afternoon for a D&C. So after all of this, I really am okay. It's sad and I wish we could have kept at least one, but it wasn't meant to be I guess. The hardest part was telling my son Nickalaus that the babies had to go to Heaven to live with bubby [Benjamin]. That broke my heart, seriously. He said okay though, [he play with Benjamin, or says he does]. So everything happens for a reason, and if we knew the reason why there'd be no reason for f a i t h.

4 comments:

  1. Glad I came across your blog. It is so cute. Sorry about your baby boy. I came over from UBP and am now following.

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  2. So sorry to read this post. I have two kids myself...they are both grown now. Had a miscarriage between them, and it was hard. Carried the baby for almost 7 months, however they told me he had actually died around months. My body just didn't let him go until later. I still think of him often and wonder what kind of life we would have had with him...but, it was not meant to be. Sending a mother's hugs to you!
    Kathy
    www.shawkl.com

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  3. Thanks Kathy! I am sorry for your loss too. I wish that women didn't have to go through that. xo

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